||[Jun. 8th, 2004|01:19 pm]
well, i did not get to see Saved today, so im a little disapointed. i did get to spend some time with my ex, which i loved. At one point i got lost looking into her eyes, i wonder how long i just starred. I would of given anything at that moment to be able to give her a kiss.|
Im slowly coming the conclusion that i am constantly being judged by the people that mean the most to me. Sometimes my friends can be very accepting and caring, and other times they can rip my heart out. I just wish people could just accept me the same way i accept them.
At the office today, i was poking Corinne for the fun of it, when all of a sudden she hurt her shoulder. i felt so incredibly bad about. i just wanted to hold her and tell her im sorry for the rest of my life. I am generally not like that with people, but Corinne is diffrent. Along time ago she asked me in my car if i could ever physically hurt her, and of course i said no. But, that means that idea is in her head, and that i give the impression of having no control over my anger. i would kill myself before i ever layed a mark on her. Damn my emotions.. i never used to care, now i suddenly i would give my life for another.. i guess i really do love her, to bad im only a friend. and not even a good friend at that.